In my scripture study, I came across a scripture that talks about what happened to me at the beginning of my transformation.  It reads:  “And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.”

This is exactly the process that I am and have experienced in the past few months.  I got to a point in my life that I just could not do it any more.  I was in such a dark place.  I was losing myself.  I was heading further and further into darkness, but my Father in Heaven helped me stop my forward momentum. He threw me a line.   Once I was able to stop and really look at myself, I had to realize that I could not get out of that darkness without the help of my Father in Heaven.  He started to reel me back in by showing me that I needed to face some of my deepest and darkest fears, hurts, and disappointments.  I had to look at them face to face, acknowledge them, and accept them for what they were.   Going through that process helped me to realize that I could not be healed on my own.  Only the Lord could take that pain away.  I was so exhausted from living like that.  I did what I new I had to do.  I got down on my knees and I prayed to my Father in Heaven, and I surrendered  all of that negativity over to the Him.  I chose to allow the atonement to work in my life.

Instead of all of the negative self-talk that I was doing, I have been slowly replacing it with faith, hope and positive thoughts and affirmations of who I really am; a daughter of God.  This is what has really given me the desire and need to change my life.  Instead of wallowing in my self-induced pitty and shame, I am now looking for ways to share my story so that I can help my brothers and sisters out there that are stuggling.  I want the love of God to emulate through me, so that others can see my light as a reflection of His.

I am so grateful to my Father in Heaven for saving me, and helping me find my way back to Him.  I love Him so much!

Rechel